You Keep Losing Him…

15 Jul

What To Do When…You Keep Losing Him…

 

IMG_20130713_193357So you had the guy interested, you gave him your number, you went on a few dates and it was going really well. There were the cute text messages, he called you when he was supposed to…and then he just stopped.

Well, there are things you just shouldn’t say to a guy. And the worst part is that you don’t know you are saying the wrong thing….

Especially when you first start dating.

Think back; did you say these things?

“I’m so ugly!” or “I feel ugly today”

IMG_20130713_192937Men don’t want to hear it.

Whether you are feeling frumpy, dirty or actually having a bad hair day… they do not want to hear it.

They will think that you are trying to score a free compliment. But really, what do you expect to hear? “Yeah, you do look ugly today.” Well if he does that, then he is in the bad books. All he can do is give you a forced compliment.

And comments like this project that you have low self esteem. When you ask men what they are after in a woman they are not going to say, “A girl with low self esteem who always talks about how she feels ugly”… Yeah…No. Men want women with confidence!

So even if you are feeling a little bit “not so hot”…bite your tongue or text it to your best friend, not this guy you are trying to get to know.

If he wants to give you a compliment, he will.

“Its our two week/one month anniversary!”

IMG_20130713_192739Especially by text, but still… don’t bring it up.

Yes you may care, but men seem to find it pressure enough to remember or want to celebrate a year anniversary, they don’t need the countdown! If you really have the unearthing desire to bring it up just say, “Wow, can you believe I’ve known you for a month already, where has the year gone…”

Casual things. Really casual….

“My ex used to do that”

IMG_20130713_193251What are you doing….

Do not bring up the ex unless you are having a heart to heart…

Your current boyfriend does not want to hear about your last boyfriend, especially if you are comparing them. The man does not want to be emasculated.

He does not want to feel compared to your ex regardless. Especially if you were the one who was dumped. Sentences like this make you appear that you are not over your ex and that’s a sign of missing him. Men still need to feel wanted and that they are the best.

And just think, would you want to hear about every thing you do similar to his ex?

 

“I’m fine”

IMG_20130713_194646Do not go all subtle on him. He is not going to enjoy reading subtext. All boys know that “I’m fine” means that you are not. But in a new relationship, the last thing he is going to want to do is get dramatic. He is going to respond with “cool” or “okay”. Do not expect him to go, “I know you are not fine, what’s the matter?” We are not in high school anymore. This is not playing a game of cat and mouse. You tell him if something is really seriously the matter, or if it isn’t, you keep your clap trap shut and put a smile on that face.

Men are not stupid. They are been around girls for a decade. They know that “I’m fine” probably means they did something wrong, but you are not going to tell them, so they better figure it out. Again, we graduated high school and left all those antics in there… If he did something wrong, be honest so he can learn from it and you can move on.

“He’s perfect!”

IMG_20130713_193823Men, as much as they won’t admit it, are emotional beings.

Regardless of all the gender equality that has been fought for, men still do not want to feel “manly”. Unless it is a jokey conversation and in the right time, do not point out how good looking other men are, or how perfect they are. The man you’re with needs to know how awesome he is, otherwise he will lose interest in you very quickly.

That also goes for celebrity crushes. Until you get into a comfortable, stable part in a relationship, you do not tell them about how perfect a celebrity is and how they are your “dream man”. The term “dream man” disappears when you talk to him, that is talk for your girlfriends.

“Why did you like her photo?/ Why are you on her profile?”

IMG_20130713_194239If you are new at this relationship you do not want to look like the jealous/needy type straight away. As much as it may kill you; keep it to yourself.

Of course, if he is constantly flirting and talking to someone in particular, that is a different situation. But if he is scrolling his instagram and likes a few pictures, do not going all jealous on his ass. You look like the psycho and it does you no favours…

So these are six phrases that we advise to stay away from in a new relationship.

Keep your male secure, keep your jealousy hidden at the beginning and don’t be subtle and fish for compliments. Keep that man feeling like a man, and you will get to keep him too!

-Jecca

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